Intimacy in Marriage

       One thing that is big in our church today is waiting until after marriage to have sexual intercourse. It is not necessarily secret, but is more so sacred to us. If we look at the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet from the church on Sexual Purity, it says "The sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife." In our church, God has commanded us that we wait until after marriage in order to enjoy this beautiful thing that he has created for us. We should think of sexual intimacy like opening up a beautiful gift that has been given to us, slowly and carefully. For some it may happen quicker than for others. Some wait for a while, and some do it right away. It is completely up to the couple as to when they feel comfortable with it. However guys tend to want it more than women. Why is this? Well it could be for a couple reasons. One being that women are insecure about their bodies and they don't want it to be seen quite yet, and I think a man should respect that. It's important that women feel safe and secure during sex with a man, and that men reciprocate that feeling. If they don't feel comfortable, they may tend to shy away from it. Another being the different chemicals that are released. For men it is dopamine and serotonin, and for women it is oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine. Women have an extra boost of oxytocin when having sex which can cause that sense of arousal. Especially during the first encounter are women going to be more nervous or maybe even less aroused. It goes back to the mindset of each a man and woman. Guys tend to have a one track mindset, whereas women tend to think about multiple things at once. Therefore, if a woman is not as aroused and feels stressed, she is less likely to stay concentrated and then they remember something else that needs to happen. It is also during intercourse that women may have multiple orgasms whereas men will only have one. And this is solely because of the way the human body works and how different a woman's body is compared to mans. Sex is something that is desired for both male and female, and that is just part of the human body's reactions. Although I think we should wait until the right time which would be after marriage.
             During your relationship, communication is a key thing. It takes time and thought to create a good intimate relationship. It's important to talk about thing when they aren't exactly going right. If you have a problem with your spouse and something they are doing, talk to them about it directly. Don't talk to your mom or your best friend. They aren't going to fix anything, and your spouse will never know the issue. It will only create bigger problems if you don't tell them. Let them know your thoughts, and work things out together so you can continue to be happy. When it comes time for starting a family, and you have kids that are learning about this, it's important that we tell them the right way, and not let them find out from friends or outside sources. If kids have a question, we should be able to tell them, and feel comfortable about it. In our society today, it is easier for kids to access it on the internet, and find out things quicker. But if they come to us, we should tell them, and tell them the importance of it, and why it is considered sacred not secret. Sex in marriage is a wonderful thing, and we should wait to have the pleasure that God has created for us. By waiting, it can strengthen our relationship with our spouse, and create a bond between the two.